The life-changing magic of tidying up
It’s very unlikely that you haven’t heard of Marie Kondo. Two books, both instantly turned bestsellers, a Netflix tv show, where she demonstrated live the folding method which drove millions crazy and kneeled on her delicate Japanese knees to thank the messy homes for welcoming her to spread joy. She has the best kind of magic to her, simple, positive, and contagious. A website, YouTube channel, and thousands of representatives around the world Kon-Marying their way to your closet. Yes, there’s an adverb to it.
And it makes sense. Yes, it’s a very humanizing and empowering way to look at our stuff, one that we are not used to, but maybe that’s what we’ve been missing all this time. Your house will be better organized after, more spacious and nicer to spend time at. But it is mainly about your personal new organized self, reflecting in your living space. Because this method, speaks to your heart, to what sparks joy for you. And to all you cynics out there, try to stay open-minded. This method is a good reminder that our stuff should make us happy, serve us, and improve our lives. Not be a constant source of stress, mess, and endless organizing.
How does it work?
You tidy the house by categories, meaning that if you’ve started with your clothes, you need to pile them all up, from all around the house, all seasons, and all purposes. That’s the only way you can truly understand what you own. There will be a short moment where you will look at that pile and swear to never buy a single garment again. Trust me, that promise won’t last long. But hopefully, you’ll have this pile in mind before you shop for another item you don’t really want, another piece that doesn’t make you happy.
How do you choose what to keep?
By the joy it sparks. And again, put your cynic self aside and hold those leggings close to your heart and figure out what it makes you feel. If every time you put it on it reminds you of all the times you’ve skipped Pilates, it’s probably not sparking joy. If you ask me, or the sweet Marie, you don’t need any garment in your closet or item in your house, or in your life, that doesn’t make you happy.
My KonMari journey
I read both books, saw the show, and yet, was completely overwhelmed when approaching my own closet. Within a minute I understood why this is such an emotional process. Yes, you can learn all the rules, but if you can do this alongside someone that can guide you through the surprising emotions your fourth-grade scouts’ shirt generates, this can result in much more than an organized wardrobe. Some people swear this changed their life. As Marie says “Keep only those things that speak to your heart. Then take the plunge and discard all the rest. By doing this, you can reset your life and embark on a new lifestyle.”
Luckily, many years ago, I’ve met a beautiful person that to me, and the world’s good fortune decided, later on, to accompany people in their Kon Marie journeys. Annabel Kupraly, known also as AnnaKup, certified Konmari Consultant, helps people in their Tidy festival from start to finish. Builds business plans on how to incorporate the method in workplaces, lectures both privately and to organizations, advises, writes, speaks, and breathes KonMari. Or more precisely, spreads this life philosophy, of living a joyful life, full of gratitude.
Reality check
I’m not a hoarder, I live in Thailand, in a relatively minimalist lifestyle, and I do not have feelings towards clothes. So what’s the problem? That none of that is true, not really. My complicated journey will be with my closet back in Israel, but even here, I realized I have more things than I realized, some of which hold very negative energy.
I own a bikini that is a constant reminder of wanting to look a certain way, and that, to say the least, does not spark joy. I have a dress I received from a friend I love very much, but I never wear the dress and always feel guilty about that. And the cherry on top, a shirt I received from a designer I worked with, which I can associate a lot of feelings with, joy not being one of them. All those feelings were automatically transferred to that shirt making me constantly mad, at the shirt, the designer, and mainly myself for still being mad.
Annabel immediately recognized the manner in which I’ve pushed away from each one of those garments, as opposed to all the clothes I held literally close to my heart, helping me understand myself through the feelings those garments generated. With the compassion and sensitivity, of an observer, she allowed me to let go. I held them tight, thanked them for valuable lessons in anger, guilt, and moving on, and moved them on to someone that will find joy in them.
Some clothes I couldn’t tell what they make me feel. We’re not really experienced in attaching emotions to things, if we haven’t done it before, and unless they generate a strong emotion. Anabelle told me to choose my favorite dress as a scale. If I will always choose that dress instead of the other garment, that other garment deserves to be set free into a more loving home, and I deserve to be unburdened by it’s presence, and the need to keep it unused. This exercise made it very easy, and in no time, I finished clearing the entire pile.
Bring new life to your clothes!
One of the most meaningful parts of this process for me was fixing up some of my things that needed some TLC. I had a few items that immediately sparked joy but had minor issues. A tiny hole, loss button, small problems, but the kind that you don’t get around to fixing in the five minutes you put into getting dressed in the morning. So, I cleared the afternoon and fixed it all! I even redid the straps to one of my favorite shirts which kept twisting and turning and kept me from wearing it. From now on, call my Saint Laurent. Or don’t.
The folding obsession!
And now to the folding. It makes sense. It keeps things organized, easy to locate, it’s Instagram-able, and it makes you want to get dressed. But despite becoming such a viral sensation, it’s not the main thing, and this is also part of your new relationship with your clothes, so if this doesn’t spark joy, thank it, and let go.
Eco hacks for your newly organized closet!
I’m a big believer in recycling and I don’t think that in the process of letting go of things, our automatic selves need a quick run to Ikea to get new things. we all have boxes or other organizing solutions around the house that we can personalize to make our own. I used a wallpaper I like, on an old toaster oven cardboard box, but it can be anything. Fabric from the clothes you‘ve decided to let go, beads, your kids’ drawings, anything! You fixed a button and made your own boxes? Martha Stewart watch out! I find it so empowering to make things ourselves, and it allows us to create a tailor-made personal space. But of course, you can always buy a box, or have a tailor fix your clothes. Whatever sparks joy!
Take this opportunity to let go of whatever doesn’t serve you, allowing you to see clearly all the great things, worthy of daily gratitude. You might start this journey with the clothes in your closet, but this will expand to all fields of your life.
